Yuki's Corner: Don't "hello" me. Where are the damn treats?

You've been gone, and I'm mad.

It's 4:30 PM, and while you've been on an 8 hour sabbatical, somebody has been holding down the fort.  Was it your roommate.  No.  It was fucking Yuki.  It's always fucking Yuki.  So when you finally do decide to end your all-day spa retreat, don't walk in this house and give me a "hello."  Get out the treats, get me to the dogpark, and let me have some fun.  No bullshit.  No excuses.  Just do it.

Now, you may think my life is a damn pleasure cruise.  Sure, while you're gone I lay on the bed, the couch, in the chair, and on the floor.  But you don't realize the stress of being the ONLY ONE in the house, protecting it from squirrels, bugs, and the sort.  One time, a rabbit was like, really close to the window.  And what did you do about it?  Not a single fucking thing.  I, on the other hand, watched patiently.  I watched and watched.  In fact, I watched for so long that the hours slipped away from me until you finally got home.  A constant detente-like state.  A perfect balance between good and evil.  And you sat by the sidelines and watched as the very fabric of our entire home nearly came unraveled.  Humans...

So, I don't think it's so much to ask that I get a little more than a, "Yuki! Hi! How are you?"  Just get the treats out and lay them on the floor.  That is what I need at this point.  Shit is stressful, and you think I want your attention?  Don't make me laugh.  Or make me do whatever it is dogs do when something is funny.

In sum:  1. Treats on the floor; 2. Me, dog park; 3. Eric, shut up.